Well the bitterness in eggplant is from the seeds and a tiny bit from the skin? Kinda like the seeds in tomato add flavor. More seeds gets you more bitter flavor.
BodhiPeace is right; the Asian eggplants are more mild in flavor especially the Japanese ones. That is why the slim Asian eggplants are becoming more popular; they have very few seeds, not bitter and tender skins. It very well could be that someone slipped something like a tiny bit of bitter melon into the eggplant mash. Restaurants do things like that to be unique.
AND it could very well be that the Filipino eggplants are different. Island genetics could very easily explain that. If you are unable to get authentic Filipino eggplant seeds sent to you from the Philippines ( or even better, go there yourself with your wife for a vacation!) you could try growing a bitter variety. Rareseeds has some from India and Central Asia that possibly have the flavor that you are looking for. They won't look the same, but they might have the right flavor.
But, if it were me, I would go and get a classic fat American (seedy) eggplant variety from a nursery today and plant it. Let a fruit get a bit over ripe (just as the glossy shine disappears so that there are lots of seeds) and have your wife make Tortang Talong.
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