GREEN ZEBRA?

[Tom Wagner]

Green Zebra?

Who would've come up with a name like that?
You'd think that whoever came up with that name was lacking imagination!

I thought Zebras were black and white?
What's with the green name with a Zebra?
A Zebra that ain't been broke yet?

How much is a "broke" Green Zebra worth?
Nothing! He's broke!
Then how much is a Green Zebra worth?
About 4.95 per lb.

What's black and white and red all over?
Answer: Outside of a newspaper it could be a Red Zebra.
Maybe a Green Zebra is a newspaper published by the Greenies?

Didn't I see mention of a Black Zebra?
Yeah, redundantly oxymoronic, isn't it?
BTW, what colors are the stripes on a Black Zebra?
If you said black on black, you'd be wrong.
Go to Trader Joe's and look for one in the produce isle.

Oh, wait a minute, did someone say tomato?
What's with this guy who developed such a tomato?
Didn't he like regular red tomatoes?
Tomatoes are supposed to be red, period, end of story!
Why green?
When do you know when it is ripe?
What do you call a Green Zebra when it is not ripe?
A green Green Zebra?

So let me get this straight.
A green Green Zebra is still green when it is ripe.
So it must mean that when a green Green Zebra turns ripe it becomes an Amber Green Zebra?
What?
Amber?
If I look at a color chart for amber, I find these color shades for amber. Hat tip to: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amber_(color)

• Tangerine Yellow
• Saffron
• Golden Poppy
• AMBER
• Selective Yellow
• Macaroni and Cheese 123)
• Sandy Brown
• Atomic Tangerine
• Gamboge
• Deep Saffron
• UNECE Amber

I think those colors are Hexes. If I know anything about colors, adding those colors to a ripe Green Zebra tomato would look mighty strange.
Keep your hexes for your exes!!!!

Illustrate your thoughts if somebody says to pick Green Zebra when the fruits turn Macaroni and Cheese; or Atomic Tangerine!
You'd have to pick up your thoughts off the ground, brush off the dirt and start over!

Oh, somebody nudged me and said the reason a ripe Green Zebra looks amber (*#@%), pun intended, is that the epidermis of a Green Zebra has a yellow (say amber) skin if you would peel the fruit.

I get it!
The flesh color of green coming through the yellow epidermis looks amber.

Wait a gosh darned minute!
What color is the epidermis when the fruit is not ripe.
What? It just magically turns the epidermis yeller when the fruit is ripening.
Somebody needs to go talk with the breeder of the Green Zebra and find out what he or she thinks.

I hope growers of Green Zebra tomatoes aren't color blind.
On top of that try picking for amber Green Zebras in the shadier areas.
That is like looking for a shadow in total darkness!
Of course, it would help it the durn grower was totally blind!
Then the grower would have to grope the tomatoes to feel for a bit of "give" or maybe use the old olfactory nose,
or "Yikes" take a bite!
Yes, the breeder said a bite of Green Zebra when it is time is like a bite of heaven - tangy to the point of getting a kick from the old Zebra.
Conversely a bite of Green Zebra before or after its time is __________.

Wait another fool second!
You mean to tell me that large growers would be better off if they would hire the blind to pick Green Zebra?
Yesiree Tom!
Hire the handicapped!
Just imagine a crew of blind men, just a feelin' up the tomatoes and selecting the sweet tangy ones just by feel.
Yes, they would do a far better job than the idiot pickers they normally have and have a smile on their faces to boot.

What would say to a contract labor group picking Green Zebra?
Anything but English!
Perhaps:
Pechan por favor sólo los maduros.
Las frutas del tomate que dan un poco cuando usted los aprieta.
Los tomates son todavía verdes cuándo maduro.
Los unos de rasgones miran un poco ámbar.

I love the response:
?Que?

But..but..don't go away, you say.
What height do the pickers have to be to pick Green Zebras?
Depends.
If you have indeterminant vines on your Green Zebras, do you need the basketball team out there to pick?
If the plants are determinants, go hire kids out of the primary grades.
You say why not teenagers?
You ever try to get a teenager to do anything?

But stop right there! I heard from the breeder of Green Zebra that the vine can be rather (Facultative): rather capable of adapting to different conditions. BTW, the opposite of facultative is obligate.

So as a grower of Green Zebra for the first time, it is your obligation to dictate how to grow!
However, don't let the neighbors see you talking (obligating) down to your Zebras. They think tomato hobbyists are nuts as it is.

I hear from the tomato vine that the breeder of Green Zebra has a new kind of Green Zebra tomato. It has a clear epidermis making it almost impossible to tell when the fruit is ripe. The breeder says it is so hard to know when to pick that going out at midnight is the best way to pick.
Mr. Whipple would be so proud. Charmin' story that, eh?

Going back to how tall the Green Zebra get.
Have you grown that other green when ripe with green striped tomato called Green Sausage or Greensleeves?
How tall do you have to be to pick them, you ask?

Most married people I know have spouses.
Before picking these Greensleeves, go talk to your spouse about how fat they look; get belittled or otherwise cut down to size and go pick!
The plant isn't called Greensleeves for nothing as you have to be down on your knees and sleeves just to pick!
After you pick the tomatoes, go back inside and tell the spouse,
"Look, Honey!" "Green Sleeves!" and get cut down to size even more by being told to do your own laundry from now on.

Tom Wagner

[Worth1]

Tom did you come up with that or what?

What else are you growing.

Worth

[Lee]

Looks like this:

[Tom Wagner]

Tom did you come up with that or what?

Yes, this is the one of the other personalities that I harbor. I use it only when common sense flies out the window.

What else are you growing.

Mostly old!

Trying to grow the younger, but that is just speeding up the growing older since it takes so much energy!

Seriously, what else am I growing? Duh...have you look at the forum called Potatoes?

_______________________________


Giving out silly, but factual information on tomatoes/potatoes and their origins since 1983 starting with Tater Mater Seeds. Conduct PM to find out where the author should be burried for glee

[Tom Wagner]

With that photo of Green Zebra, why do I get the feeling that someone is going to throw it at me?


__________________________________________


Intelligence is knowing a tomato breeder is a fruitcake.
Wisdom is knowing not to tell him that he is indeed one.

[Worth1]

I know your growing potatoes but that is not what I'm talking about.

Never mind.

Worth

[Tom Wagner]

I know your growing potatoes but that is not what I'm talking about.

I grow lots of different kinds of tomatoes.

Seed extracting right now includes collecting F-3 seeds from a cross I made in 2006 between Gary Ibsen's strain of Brandywine and my F-9 Brandy Stripes (a woolly version of Vintage Wine).

This is identified as 14 2-6-08
Description: Potato leaf, woolly, pink yellow stripes, meaty interior, no cracks or catfacing, 5 foot tall, good flavor for greenhouse grown. Further segregation expected: Little to None

As an F-1 plant it was
identified as 10 3-23-07
Description: Potato leaf, pink fruits with faint stripes, 10 locules 3 1/2 inches across. slightly woolly. Segregation expected: High levels

I had to get the seed extracted in a hurry in order to send south to grow out to the F-4 seed to be able to plant next year to produce F-5 seed by this time in one year.

Is this what you mean by what else I am growing?

If you need more examples of what I am doing, I will be on the next F-3 seed extraction at random.

Tom

[kygreg]

Tom, have you been fermenting those Green Zebras and inhaling the aroma a little too long? lol

[Tom Wagner]

I don't ferment
as I find that torment
I am one of those gents
who uses TSP to dispense
of the noise my spouse would vent,
should the smell of tomatoes spent
drift through the house with a scent
that would shift her nose a bit bent.
I like seed to be a clean as a new copper cent
and return to me casting afar from its descent
a travel well went.
So as far as a thing classed to ferment
give me that a drink later that is meant
to rhyme with a Dutch Heinekent.

[kygreg]

Trying to find a rhyme for Dutch Hienekent
would not be time well spent
because by the time I found
a rhyme word or similar sound
I would not be of good cheer
and would drink all the beer;

[WVTomatoMan]

Tom,

Dude. You're a scream. That was hilarious.

"What's with the green name with a Zebra?"
An inexperienced zebra would be a green zebra, right? :-)

All this stuff about color reminds me of when my two buddies were having a lively discussion about whether one of them lived in a pink house or not. Of course the other insisted that it was peach. Of course I had the resolution. Pink is a color, peach is a fruit that grows on a tree. Unfortunately my buddy Dan lives in a pink house. He only invites us over to visit at night. :-)

Randy